Blue Star Dominion License Expires, Press Conference Held
PII – The camera flickers on to show a row of microphones in front of a trio of sentients. HoloCam droids flash and buzz around the room, vying for the prime snapshot. On the left, a non-verbal Mandalorian sits awkwardly, oftentimes shielding their T-visor from the camera’s view. To the right is an ordinary looking human clad in blue, who seemingly refuses to break eye contact with the camera, or even blink for that matter. In the middle sits a Besalisk in orange robes, holding what appears to be a children’s puppet depicting an Ewok. Laid out unceremoniously on the table before them sits a motionless lobster, an inanimate action figure of an Old Republic clone trooper, and a sedated red spider, barely twitching any of its eight legs.
Looking into the camera, the Besalisk asks “Are we ready? Good.” Clearing his throat, he closes all but one corner of his mouth and proceeds to bring the puppet to life. “Welcome folks, one and all, to the first official neo-Blue Star Dominion press conference! We’re happy to answer any questions from the audience. Yub nub! Yes, you sir, with the bulbous head.”
A Bith stands with a pen and notepad in hand. “Thank you. I noticed you clarified this is the neo-Blue Star Dominion. What happened to the old Blue Star Dominion?”
A seriousness washes over the puppet. All jubilance and glee exits its body as it sits motionless on the hand of its controller. “They are unavailable.” The silence hangs in the air for another few moments before it resumes its playful, bouncy attitude. “Any other questions? You, the elderly, old, wrinkly, decomposing human.”
“Umm, me? Okay… Will this rebranding have any effect on the ongoing alliance between the Blue Star Dominion and the New Republic?”
The puppet nods. “Yes, yes I suppose it does. After discussing with my assistants here, we have come to the conclusion it’s in our best interest to just call the whole thing off. No more NR and BSD. NR? More like No Regard. No regard for how much money they’re making us!” The puppet laughs joyfully and turns to the Mandalorian who has since taken to mindlessly scribbling on a sheet. Realizing the camera has now panned to him, the warrior quickly ducks under the table which begins to rattle furiously. “Next! Yes you,” points the puppet.
A Harch stands and asks “What do you have to say about the allegations?”
“The allegations? Which ones?!” The Ewok puppet breaks out into a fit of maniacal laughter that lasts for several moments before it calms back down. “Allegations? Whew,” the puppet wipes sweat from its brow. “I thought you were gonna ask about the double-redacted HoloNet message. Yep, that was actually me and the Chief of State.” An exhausted yawn escapes from the puppet. “Boring question. Anything more exciting?”
A Corellian male rises and begins reading from a datapad. “Reports from the Khuiumin front show that on day 117 you paid a ten digit sum to one… Khagan of the Son-tuul Pride, as payment for a land acquisition in the Khuiumin system. Then, on day 127 a private HoloNet communication leaked showing video of the Chief of State accusing the leadership of the Restored Empire of harboring a relationship with said Khagan, which was used as prime cause for their dismissal from the New Republic’s alliance. As a member of the alliance, er… former alliance, and having been present for the meeting, can you clear the air on where you stand with the Son-tuul Pride and their Khagan?”
“No. Any more questions?” Dozens of hands shoot skyward as the Ewok puppet adds “No? Well thank you everyone for coming out and asking such insightful questions. You know what they say, if we could all ask such great questions… The galaxy would be a better place or something, I don’t know.” The Besalisk rises from his seat and removes the puppet from his hand, tossing it onto the table with the other displayed trinkets. The camera zooms in on the once-animated face of the lifeless doll for a few moments before finally cutting to black.
